How to handle cyberbullies

By Sharon Miller Cindrich

Q: My 3rd-grade daughter loves e-mail, but has been getting mean messages from some of the girls at school calling her fat. I think it should be reported. Am I overreacting?

A: You are not overreacting. Cyberbullying is a serious problem and studies show that roughly 25% of kids in school today have experienced some form of cyberbullying. (Name-calling is just one kind of cyberbullying; other forms include exclusion, rumors, harassment, threats, impersonation and stalking.) Unfortunately, girls are more susceptible than boys.

Bad online behavior should be dealt with immediately and parents can help by stepping in, teaching kids to identify bullying behavior and taking these actions:

• Don’t respond online. Responding to a bully online just fuels the fire. Teach kids to tell an adult before they fire back.
  
• Block the messages. Your Internet service provider can help you block unwanted email, and most instant messaging programs offer a block or ban option.
  
• Alert others. If you know the bully, contact parents or school administration, and let them know about the behavior. If bullying persists and includes threats or harm, contact local law enforcement.

Sometimes kids who just want to joke around unwittingly behave like bullies. Due to the anonymous and impersonal nature of the Internet, teasing, pranks and even humor can easily be misinterpreted and become hurtful and harassing.

Kids aren’t the only ones who bully online. Grownups, and even some parents, make cruel remarks or play jokes on others. Make sure you model good Internet behavior and send a strong message to your family that communicating online is a privilege, and irresponsible use can put their access in jeopardy.

Learn more about cyberbullying at stopcyberbullying.org.

Sharon Miller Cindrich is a mother of two and the author of E-Parenting: Keeping Up With Your Tech-Savvy Kids.