Surprising Ways to Help Kids Excel

Simple, science-backed solutions that won't cost you a penny!

Expert tips from Michele Borba, Ed.D.

Academic success impacts our children for the rest of their lives, so it’s no wonder we go to great lengths to give our kids an academic edge. “Despite their good intentions, parents often overlook a few simple strategies proven to impact children's academic success,” says parenting expert and educational psychologist Michele Borba.

1. Increase Their Zzz’s.
Ninety percent of parents believe their kids get enough sleep each night, yet studies show that about one-third of those kids are actually sleep-deprived. And lack of sleep can have a serious impact on children's abilities to learn and perform at school. In one recent study, Tel Aviv University researchers found that missing just one hour of sleep can be enough to reduce a child's cognitive abilities by almost two grade levels the next day. For example, a sixth grader who loses precious zzz's the night before a big test could end up performing at a fourth grade level.

“Setting and keeping to a nighttime routine is the key," explains Borba. “Set a bedtime and keep to it every single night. Flashing images affect REM, so be sure to turn off the computer and television at least 30 minutes prior to bedtime. And take away the cell phones during nighttime hours—62 percent of kids admit that they use it after the lights go out and their parents are clueless. Most importantly, watch out for caffeinated sleep stealers like cold medications, chocolate, or energy drinks.”

2. Praise Effort (not Outcome).
Columbia University researchers found that how we praise our kids' schoolwork can actually enhance or impede their achievement. Instead of encouraging your child to bring home straight A's, put the emphasis on how hard she is working. Kids who are praised for their persistence are more likely to blame setbacks on not trying hard enough, rather than on a lack of ability (a belief that can discourage kids very easily). “Praise your child's effort, not his IQ,” Borba asserts.

3. Let Them Learn Their Way.
Harvard researcher Howard Gardner's work shows that there are eight kinds of intelligences—or ways kids learn best: musical, spatial, logical-mathematical, linguistic, bodily, intrapersonal, interpersonal, and naturalist. “Help your child identify how he learns best,” says Borba, “then find ways to use those strengths to boost learning success.” Whether it means allowing background noise, color-coding spelling words, or helping your student see and touch the things he is learning about, you may be surprised at how quickly he'll excel when he's allowed to learn things in his own way.

4. Guide Them to Good Friends.
Peer pressure can work both ways. If your child chooses friends who believe that education is important, chances are she will adopt those attitudes, hit the books and focus in class. On the flip side, if your child’s best buddy tunes out during class, doesn't turn in homework assignments, and rarely studies, chances are she will fall in line with her friend's bad habits.

“Make your home a kid-friendly hangout,” Borba suggests, “so that you can become familiar with your child's friends.” She also suggests getting your child involved in extracurricular activities and clubs that will introduce her to like-minded pals. “While younger kids choose their friends based on accessibility, older kids tend to choose friends based on similar values and interests,” Borba explains.

5. Make Home a Stress-Free Zone.
Research shows that the conflict kids face at home spills over into their school life and impedes learning. In fact, family-induced stress can affect kids' learning and behavior for up to two days following an incident. “Rather than devoting your evenings at home to sibling squabbles and dinnertime debates, find ways to de-stress with your kids,” Borba suggests. “Take longs walks, read together, do yoga, or have a family movie night.”

“Once you learn how to tune into your child's stress signs,” says Borba, “you'll be able to recognize when he's on overload so that you can intervene and help him to decompress before something comes to blows.” When conflicts do arise, parents can model how to disagree without letting things escalate into a screaming match.

None of these tips require you to take out a second mortgage or get a second job. What they do require is your time and attention. “If you want to boost your kid's academic performance and see lasting results, it will take a few things from you: consistency, dedication, and patience,” concludes Borba. “Those things are always better parenting tools than anything money can buy. If you pay attention to the individual needs of each child and do what's right for them and for you, you'll see the payoff in their attitudes and their report cards.”

Michele Borba, Ed.D., an educational psychologist, former teacher and mom, has authored 22 books including The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries (Jossey-Bass/A Wiley Imprint, September 2009).